What does Success mean to an INFJ?

What does Success mean to an INFJ?
成功對于INFJ意味著什么？

People with the INFJ personality type are intense and perfectionistic. They have deep insights into many aspects of life, and usually have very high standards for their own understanding and accomplishments, as well as those of others. They are service-oriented and empathetic to other individuals. The INFJ strives for the ideal in every aspect of their life. An INFJ's feeling of success is centered around their own level of understanding and accomplishment, their usefulness or service to others, and the condition of their personal relationships. The INFJ feels successful when they haved used their very deep understanding of something to do a real service for someone. We often see INFJ personality types as counsellors and teachers, or in the medical and health fields.
INFJ型的人是感情濃烈和完美主義的。他們對于生命的許多方面具有深刻的洞察力，并且用相當(dāng)高的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)來評價自己和他人的認(rèn)知以及成就。面對其他個體時，他們是服務(wù)導(dǎo)向的和感情移入的。INFJ在他們生命的各個方面都追求理想主義。INFJ對于成功的感覺是基于他們自身的認(rèn)知和成就水平，他們對于其他人的價值和服務(wù)能力，以及他們的私人人際關(guān)系狀況。當(dāng)INFJ運用了他們對于某件事的深刻認(rèn)知來為某個人提供真正的服務(wù)之后，他們會感受到成就感。我們常看到INFJ當(dāng)顧問或者教師，或是看到他們在醫(yī)學(xué)和健康領(lǐng)域工作。

Allowing Your INFJ Strengths to Flourish
讓你的INFJ力量茂盛發(fā)展

As an INFJ, you have gifts that are specific to your personality type that aren't natural strengths for other types. By recognizing your special gifts and encouraging their growth and development, you will more readily see your place in the world, and be more content with your role.
作為一個INFJ，你擁有你的人格類型所特有的天賦，它們對于其他類型來說并不是天生就有的能力。通過識別你的獨特天賦，并激勵它們成長和發(fā)展，你可以更加容易的在這個世界上定位自己，并且更加滿意于自己的角色。

Nearly all INFJs will recognize the following characteristics in themselves. They should embrace and nourish these strengths:
差不多所有INFJ都會發(fā)現(xiàn)他們具有下列特質(zhì)。他們應(yīng)當(dāng)擁抱和滋養(yǎng)這些力量：

They're extremely insightful, and see things that are not obvious to others. This ability to see patterns and meanings in the world can help the INFJ in many different ways. INFJs usually have a great deal of insight into different people and situations.
1.他們極其富有洞察力，可以看到那些對于其他人來說并非顯而易見的事情。這種在世界上發(fā)現(xiàn)模式和涵義的能力可以在許多不同的方面幫助INFJ。INFJ常常擁有大量的深入洞察，涉及到形形色色的人和形勢。#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#

When given a goal or context, an INFJ is able to generate all kinds of possibilities. They're able to see the problem from many different angles.
2.當(dāng)被給予了一個目標(biāo)或者背景后，INFJ有能力找出各種各樣的可能性。他們能從多種不同的角度看待問題。

They understand how others are feeling, and are genuinely concerned with others. This natural empathy and caring helps to be really effective at helping others through problems. In this manner, they make great friends, counselors, teachers, and mates.
3.他們理解別人的感受，并且真誠的關(guān)心別人。這種天生的移情和關(guān)懷讓他們能夠有效的幫助他人解決問題。因此，他們可以成為非常好的朋友，顧問，教師和伙伴。

An INFJ has a "stick to it" attitude. They're not afraid of hard work, and will put forth a great deal of effort towards something that they believe in. This persistence will help the INFJ to achieve an identified goal.
4.INFJ有著一種“堅持不懈”的態(tài)度。他們不畏懼艱苦工作，會為了相信的事情投入大量努力。這種持久性會幫助INFJ實現(xiàn)明確的目標(biāo)。

Perfectionistic and idealistic, they always strive for the best.
5.作為完美主義和理想主義的人，他們總是努力做到最好。

Usually intelligent and able to concentrate and focus, the INFJ can usually grasp difficult ideas and concepts.
6.一般來說，INFJ聰明，可以集中注意力并專注于某件事，他們常常能領(lǐng)會復(fù)雜的觀點和概念。

INFJs who have a well-developed Extraverted Feeling function to complement their dominant Introverted iNtuition will enjoy these very special gifts:
那些充分發(fā)展了外傾情感功能來輔助他們的主導(dǎo)內(nèi)傾直覺功能的INFJ可以享有這些非常獨特的天賦：

They can turn their insightful understanding about a situation into a successful plan of action.
1.他們可以將對于形勢的深入認(rèn)知轉(zhuǎn)變?yōu)槌晒Φ男袆臃桨浮?/p>

The INFJ with well-developed judgment will be able to grasp and process concepts that are beyond what their natural intelligence appears to be able to handle.
2.充分發(fā)展了判斷的INFJ能領(lǐng)會和處理那些以他們天生的智力好像無法掌握的概念。

They may achieve a level of understanding that makes them appear wise.
3.他們能達到一定的認(rèn)知水平，使他們顯得有智慧。

The INFJ's perfectionism and idealism, when combined with their empathy and genuine concern for others, can cause them to be true servants for people in some fashion. They may be great doctors or ministers or counselors. If they have also achieved a good amount of life wisdom, they can become powerful forces, such as Jesus (INFJ) and Mahatma Ghandi (INFJ).
4.INFJ的完美主義和理想主義，與他們的移情和對別人的真誠關(guān)心結(jié)合在一起時，可以使得他們成為一定程度上的真正為人們服務(wù)的人。他們可能是偉大的醫(yī)生，大臣或顧問。如果他們還擁有大量的人生智慧，他們可以成為強大的力量，如耶穌(INFJ)和圣雄甘地(INFJ)。#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#

Potential Problem Areas
可能的問題區(qū)域

With any gift of strength, there is an associated weakness. Without "bad", there would be no "good". Without "difficult", there would be no "easy". We value our strengths, but we often curse and ignore our weaknesses. To grow as a person and get what we want out of life, we must not only capitalize upon our strengths, but also face our weaknesses and deal with them. That means taking a hard look at our personality type's potential problem areas.
任何天賦力量都有其相關(guān)的弱點。沒有“壞”，也就沒有“好”。沒有“困難”，也就沒有“容易”。我們重視自己的力量，但卻常常詛咒和忽略自己的弱點。為了成長為一個人，并得到我們生命中想要的東西，我們不僅要讓我們的力量成為自己的資本，也要面對我們的弱點點并解決他們。這意味著苛刻的審視我們的人格類型的可能的問題區(qū)域。

INFJs are rare and intelligent people with many special gifts. This should be kept in mind as you read some of the more negative material about INFJ weaknesses. Remember that these weaknesses are natural. We offer this information to enact positive change, rather than as blatant criticism. We want you to grow into your full potential, and be the happiest and most successful person that you can become.
INFJ是稀有而聰明的人，擁有許多獨特的天賦。當(dāng)你讀一些關(guān)于INFJ的弱點的比較負(fù)面的資料時，這一點要牢記在心。記住這些弱點是天生的。我們提供這些信息是為了幫你做出正面的改變，而不是指責(zé)。我們希望你發(fā)揮出你所有的潛力，并成為你能成為的最快樂和成功的人。

Most of the weaker characteristics that are found in INFJs are due to their dominant function (Introverted iNtuition) overtaking their personality to the point that the other forces in their personality exist merely to serve the purposes of Introverted iNtuition. In such cases, an INFJ may show some or all of the following weaknesses in varying degrees:
大部分在INFJ身上找到的較弱的性格特征是由于他們的主導(dǎo)功能(內(nèi)傾直覺)在他們的人格中處于過于壓制性的地位，到了他們?nèi)烁裰械钠渌麆萘H僅為服務(wù)內(nèi)傾直覺的意志而存在的地步。在這種情況下，INFJ會在不同程度上表現(xiàn)出某些或全部下述的弱點：

May be unaware (and sometimes uncaring) of how they come across to others
1.可能不知道(并且有時不在意)怎樣使別人理解他們。

May quickly dismiss input from others without really considering it
2.可能在沒有真正思考的情況下丟棄別人輸入的信息。

May apply their judgment more often towards others, rather than towards themselves
3.可能更經(jīng)常的將他們的判斷運用于別人，而不是自己身上。

With their ability to see an issue from many sides, they may always find others at fault for any problems in their lives
4.擁有著從多個不同的側(cè)面看待一個問題的能力，他們可能不斷在別人生命的任何問題上發(fā)現(xiàn)錯誤。

May have unrealistic and/or unreasonable expectations of others
5.可能對別人抱有不現(xiàn)實的 和/或 不合理的期望。

May be intolerant of weaknesses in others
6.可能無法容忍別人的缺點。

May believe that they're always right
7.可能相信他們總是對的。

May be obsessive and passionate about details that may be unimportant to the big picture
8.可能會著迷和熱情于對于全局不重要的細節(jié)。

May be cuttingly derisive and sarcastic towards others
9.可能會尖銳的嘲笑和譏諷別人。

May have an intense and quick temper
10.可能會有感情用事和易怒的脾氣。

May be tense, wound up, have high blood pressure and find it difficult to relax
11.可能會緊張，激動，有高血壓并發(fā)現(xiàn)很難放松。

May hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people
12.可能心懷怨恨，很難原諒別人。

May be wishy-washy and unsure how to act in situations that require quick decision making
13.可能是空洞的，并且在需要快速做出決定的環(huán)境下不知道該如何行動。

May have difficulty communicating their thoughts and feelings to others
14.可能在和別人交流他們的想法和感受方面有困難。

May see so many tangents everywhere that they can't stay focused on the bottom line or the big picture
15.可能在處處看到大量的離題信息，以至于無法專注于底線或者全圖。

Explanation of Problems
問題的解釋

Most of the problems described above are a result of Introverted iNtuition overtaking the INFJ's personality to the point that all of the other functions become slaves to Introverted iNtuition. A healthy personality needs to have a good balance between its dominant and auxiliary functions. For an INFJ, the dominant Introverted iNtuition needs to be well-supported by the auxiliary Extraverted Feeling function. If Extraverted Feeling exists only to support the desires of Introverted iNtuition, then neither function is being used to its potential.
大部分上面描述的問題是由于內(nèi)傾直覺在INFJ的人格中處于過于壓制性的地位，到了所有其他功能都成為內(nèi)傾直覺的奴隸的地步。健康的人格需要在它的主導(dǎo)和輔助功能之間有一個好的平衡。對于INFJ來說，主導(dǎo)內(nèi)傾直覺功能需要得到輔助外傾情感功能的良好支持。如果外傾情感僅為支持內(nèi)傾直覺的欲望而存在，那么兩種功能都沒有發(fā)揮出它們的潛力。

Introverted iNtuition is a personality function that constantly gathers information, and sees everything from many different perspectives. As the dominant player in a personality, it has the effect of constantly bombarding the psyche with new information to consider. Introverted iNtuition is sort of like a framework for understanding that exists in the mind. As something is perceived, it is melded into the existing intuitive framework. If an entirely new piece of information is perceived by the Introverted iNtuitive, that person must redefine their entire framework of reference. So, Introverted iNtuitives are constantly taking in information about the world that needs to be processed in a relatively lengthy manner in order to be understood. That presents quite a challenge to the INFJ. It's not unusual for an INFJ to feel overwhelmed with all of the things that he or she needs to consider in order to fully understand an idea or situation.#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#
內(nèi)傾直覺是一個持續(xù)的收集信息，并且從很多不同的角度看待所有的東西的人格功能。作為人格中的主導(dǎo)者，它擁有不斷的用新的待考慮的信息來轟炸精神的能力。內(nèi)傾直覺有幾分像一個存在于頭腦里的認(rèn)知框架。當(dāng)某個東西被感知后，它就被納入這個已經(jīng)存在的直覺框架。如果一條徹底陌生的信息被內(nèi)傾直覺所感知，這個人就必須對他的整個索引框架進行重定義。因此，為了達到理解的目的，內(nèi)傾直覺持續(xù)不斷的以一種相對而言冗長的方式收集關(guān)于這個世界的待處理的信息。這對于INFJ來說是挺大的一項挑戰(zhàn)。對于INFJ來說，為了徹底的理解一個觀點或者形勢，他們要考慮所有的事情，這讓他們感到緊張不安，這種情況是不稀罕的。

When Introverted iNtuition dominates the INFJ such that the other functions cannot serve their own purposes, we find the INFJ cutting off information that it needs to consider. If the psyche is presented with information that looks anything like something that Introverted iNtuition has processed in the past, it uses Extraverted Feeling to quickly reject that information. The psyche uses Extraverted Feeling to reject the ideas, rather than taking the information into its intuitive framework, and therefore potentially causing that framework to be reshaped and redefined.
當(dāng)內(nèi)傾直覺支配了INFJ，使得其他功能無法服務(wù)于它們自身的目的時，我們發(fā)現(xiàn)INFJ切除那些需要考慮的信息。如果精神被給予了一條看起來像是內(nèi)傾直覺過去已經(jīng)處理過的某種東西的信息，它便用外傾情感來迅速的拒絕這條信息。精神用外傾情感來拒絕觀點，而不是將信息納入它的直覺框架，并因此而可能導(dǎo)致框架的重塑和重定義。

Using Extraverted Feeling in this manner may effectively serve the immediate needs of Introverted iNtuition, but it is not ideal. It causes the INFJ to not consider information that may be useful or criticial in developing a real understanding of an issue. It may cause the INFJ to come off as too strongly opinionated or snobbish to others.
以這種方式使用外傾情感可以有效的滿足內(nèi)傾直覺的直接需求，但這不是理想的做法。這導(dǎo)致INFJ不去考慮那些在發(fā)展對于一個問題的真實認(rèn)知時可能有用或者關(guān)鍵的信息。這可能導(dǎo)致INFJ表現(xiàn)的太強烈的固執(zhí)己見或者對別人勢利。

The better use of Extraverted Feeling for an INFJ would be to use it to assess the INFJ's rich insights and weigh them against the external world. When the INFJ personality uses Extraverted Feeling to cut off incoming information, rather than to judge internal intuitions, it is effectively cheating itself. It's like getting the answers to a test without having to really understand the questions. It's easier to get the answer right away, rather than to have to figure everything out. For the INFJ, who has a tremendous amount of information and "studying" that needs to be done, it's very tempting to take shortcuts. Most INFJs will do this to some extent. The real problems occur when an INFJ personality has become so imbalanced that its owner is extremely self-important and rarely consider anyone else's opinions or ideas.#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#
對于INFJ來說，更好的使用外傾情感的辦法是用它來評估INFJ的豐富的洞察，并把這些洞察放在外部世界中衡量。當(dāng)INFJ人格用外傾情感來切除得到的信息，而不是判斷內(nèi)在的直覺時，它是在有效的欺騙自己。這就像在沒有真正理解問題的情況下得到一個測試的答案。與不得不想方設(shè)法把所有的東西想明白相比，立刻得到答案要輕松一些。INFJ有著數(shù)量驚人的信息和待完成的“學(xué)習(xí)”，走捷徑是十分有誘惑力的。大部分INFJ會在某種程度上這么做。當(dāng)INFJ人格變得非常不平衡，以至于它的主人極其自大并且很少考慮任何其他人的看法或觀點時，真正的問題出現(xiàn)了。

Solutions
解決方法

To grow as an individual, the INFJ needs to focus on applying their judgment to things only after they have gone through their intuition. In other words, the INFJ needs to consciously try not to use their judgment to dismiss ideas prematurely. Rather, they should use their judgment against their own ideas. One cannot effectively judge something that they don't understand. The INFJ needs to take things entirely into their intuition in order to understand them. It may be neccesary to give your intuition enough time to work through the new information so that it can rebuild its global framework of understanding. INFJs need to focus on using their judgment not to dismiss ideas, but rather to support their intuitive framework.
為了成長為一個個體，INFJ需要專注于，只有在他們通過了他們的直覺之后，才將他們的判斷應(yīng)用到事物上。換句話說，INFJ需要有意識的努力不要讓他們的判斷過早的丟棄觀點。相反，他們應(yīng)該將他們的判斷用于他們自己的觀點。一個人無法有效的判斷他不理解的東西。INFJ需要把事物完整的收入他們的直覺以理解它們。給你的直覺足夠的時間來處理完新的信息，使得它能重建它的全局認(rèn)知框架，可能是必要的。INFJ需要專注于不用他們的判斷來丟棄觀點，而用它們來支持他們的直覺框架。

An INFJ who is concerned with personal growth will pay close attention to the subject of their judgments, and their motivation for making judgments. Are they judging something external to themself, or are they judging something that they have sifted through their intuition? Is the motivation for judging something to be able to understand its usefulness in the world, or to dismiss it? Too often, an INFJ will judge something without properly understanding it, and with the intention of dismissing it. Seek first to understand, then to judge.
一個關(guān)心個人成長的INFJ會密切關(guān)注他們判斷的目標(biāo)，以及他們做判斷的動機。他們在判斷他們外部的某個東西，還是在判斷已經(jīng)被他們的直覺篩過的某個東西？判斷某個東西的動機是為了能夠理解它在這個世界上的有用性，還是為了丟棄它？太過于頻繁的，INFJ在沒有正確理解某個東西的情況下判斷它，帶著丟棄它的意圖。首先努力做到理解，然后再判斷。#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#

Living Happily in our World as an INFJ
以INFJ的方式在我們的世界中快樂的生活

Some INFJs have difficulty fitting into our society. Their problems are generally associated with not knowing (or caring) how they come across to others, and with having unreasonable expectations for others' behaviors. Both of these issues stem from using Extraverted Feeling primarily to dismiss external ideas, rather than to sort through their own intuitions.
一些INFJ在適應(yīng)我們的社會方面存在困難。他們的問題一般與不知道(或不關(guān)心)怎樣讓別人理解他們，和對別人的行為抱有不合理的期望有關(guān)。這兩個問題都起源于主要使用外傾情感來丟棄外部的觀點，而不是整理他們自己的直覺。

An INFJ who uses Extraverted Feeling in this diminished manner may become so strongly opinionated that they form rigid and unreasonable expectations for others. They may feel so strongly about things that they become very passionate and agitated when they feel that something has gone wrong. In these cases, it's not uncommon for the INFJ to express their displeasure with biting sarcasm. They become so emotionally upset that they are generally not aware of how their behavior comes across to others. Even if the consequences of their attitude and behavior is pointed out to them, they may be agitated to the point that they don't care. This kind of situation can be devastating to the INFJ on many levels, and should be avoided. There isn't much that can be done once the INFJ has reached the point where they are too upset to care about others, but the INFJ can prevent this problem from occuring by ensuring that they never get to that point.
一個用這種衰退的方式使用外傾情感的INFJ可能變得如此強烈的固執(zhí)己見，以至于對別人形成剛性和不合理的期望。當(dāng)他們感覺到什么東西不對勁時，他們對于事物的感受是如此的強烈，以至于變得非常的激動易怒和焦慮不安。(譯者：我將passionate翻譯成激動易怒，agitated翻譯成焦慮不安，不知道是否正確。)在這些情況下，INFJ帶著尖刻的譏諷表達他們的不快并不是一件罕見的事情。他們變得在情緒上如此煩亂不安，以至于一般意識不到怎樣讓別人理解他們的行為。即使有人向他們指出了他們的態(tài)度和行為的后果，他們也可能處于太過于焦慮不安的狀況而并不在意。這種情況在很多不同的層次上對于INFJ來說都是毀滅性的，應(yīng)該避免。一旦INFJ已經(jīng)到了因為太煩亂不安而無法關(guān)注別人的地步，那就沒有什么挽回的余地，但INFJ應(yīng)該保證他們永遠不到這個地步，以阻止這個問題發(fā)生。

How can you, as an INFJ, ensure that you won't get that upset? It probably seems to you that these kinds of upsets are caused by external circumstances and situations. Well, that's not really true. It's true that things will happen over which you have no control. But you certainly have control over how you perceive these things, or more appropriately, how you *judge* these things.#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#
作為一個INFJ，你怎樣保證你自己不會變的那么煩亂不安？很可能對于你來說，這些各式各樣的煩亂不安好像是由于外部的環(huán)境和形勢引起的。其實，這并不完全正確。超過你的控制力的事情確實會發(fā)生。但是你理所當(dāng)然的可以控制你如何來感知這些事物，或者更準(zhǔn)確一點，你如何來*判斷*這些事物。

Specific suggestions:
特別的建議：

Take care to listen to someone's idea entirely before you pass judgment on it. Ask questions if neccesary. Do whatever it takes to make sure that you understand the idea. Try not to begin judging anything about the idea until you have understood it entirely.
1.務(wù)必在你對某個人的觀點下判斷前，徹底的聽清楚他的觀點。在必要時問問題。做任何該做的事以確定你理解了這個觀點。努力做到在你徹底理解這個觀點之前，不要開始對它做任何判斷。

Before you begin talking to another person, pause for a moment and look at that person. Take in that person's attitude and feelings at that moment. Be aware of the person with whom you're speaking.
2.在你與別人交談之前，停頓一會兒，看那個人。在這個時候了解他的態(tài)度和感覺。當(dāng)你說話時，注意與你說話的人。

If you become upset, walk away immediately. DO NOT express anger. When you get angry, you lose. After you have calmed down, apologize for leaving and continue with what you were doing.
3.當(dāng)你變得煩亂不安時，立刻走開。~~~不~~~~~~要~~~表達憤怒。當(dāng)你變得氣憤時，你就失敗了。當(dāng)你平靜下來之后，為離開而道歉，并繼續(xù)你之前做的事。

Try to identify the personality type of everyone that you encounter frequently in your life. Remember that people with the Sensing preference need to be communicated with in a direct, concise manner. Speak plainly and simply with Sensors, giving "yes" or "no" answers.
4.努力鑒別所有你的人生中會常常遇到的人的人格類型。記住具有S偏好的人需要以直接，簡明的方式來交流。以清晰和簡單的方式與S說話，給出“是”或“否”的回答。

Try to be on good terms with all people, even those that you consider beneath you. Try to understand that everybody has something to offer.
5.努力與所有人和睦相處，甚至是那些你覺得不如你的人。努力理解每個人都可以提供一些東西。

Ten Rules to Live By to Achieve INFJ Success
獲得INFJ的成功要遵循的十條規(guī)則

Feed Your Strengths! Do things that allow your brilliant intuition and service-oriented manner to flourish.
1.喂養(yǎng)你的力量！做那些能讓你的卓越的直覺和服務(wù)導(dǎo)向的個性茂盛發(fā)展的事情。

Face Your Weaknesses! See your weaknesses for what they are, and seek to overcome them. Especially, strive to use your judgment against your internal ideas and intuitions, rather than as a means of disregarding other people's ideas.#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#
2.面對你的缺點！看清楚你的缺點是什么，努力克服它們。特別是，力圖將你的判斷用于你的內(nèi)部的觀點和直覺上，而不是用它來忽視其他人的觀點。

Talk Through Your Thoughts. You need to step through your intuitions in order to put them into perspective. Give yourself time to do this, and take advantage of discussing ideas with others. You'll find externalizing your internal intuitions to be a valuable exercise.
3.與別人詳細討論你的想法。為了將你的直覺轉(zhuǎn)變?yōu)檫h景，你需要逐步(譯者：測試？驗證？分析？整理？這里我也不大清楚該怎么翻譯)通過你的直覺。給你自己時間來做這件事，并利用與別人討論觀點的方式。你會發(fā)現(xiàn)使你的內(nèi)部直覺外部化是一項有價值的鍛煉。

Take in Everything. Don't dismiss ideas prematurely because you don't respect the person generating the ideas, or because you think you already know it all. After all, everybody has something to offer, and nobody knows everything. Steven Covey says it so well when he says: "Seek first to understand, and then to be understood."
4.接受一切。不要因為你不尊重提出觀點的人，或者因為你認(rèn)為你已經(jīng)完全明白了，而過早的丟棄觀點。畢竟每個人都能提供一些東西，沒人知道所有的事情。Steven Covey的這句話說的非常好，“首先努力做到理解，然后再尋求被別人理解。”

When You Get Angry, You Lose. Your passion and intensity are strong assets, but can be very harmful if you allow yourself to fall into the "Anger Trap". Remember that Anger is destructive to your personal relationships. Work through your anger before you impress it upon others, or you will likely find yourself alone. Disagreements and disappointments can only be handled effectively in a non-personal and dispassionate manner.
5.當(dāng)你生氣時，你就失敗了。你的熱誠和感情濃烈是強大的資產(chǎn)，但也能變得非常有害，如果你讓自己落入“~憤怒~~陷阱~”的話。記住~憤怒~對于你的個人人際關(guān)系是破壞性的。在給別人留下憤怒的印象前處理完你的憤怒，不然你有可能會發(fā)現(xiàn)你自己獨自一人。只有用非個人的并且冷靜不帶感情的方式，才能有效的處理分歧和失望。

Keep Your Eye on the Big Picture Watch out for your tendency to become obsessed with details. If you find yourself feeling very, very strongly about a small detail, take a big step back and make sure that you can still see the goal. You're not going to get there if you get mired in the details.
6.密切關(guān)注全局。對于你癡迷細節(jié)的傾向保持警覺。如果你發(fā)現(xiàn)自己對于一個小細節(jié)有著非常，非常強烈的感覺，后退一大步并確定你仍然能看到目標(biāo)。如果你深陷于細節(jié)的泥潭之中，你無法達成目標(biāo)。

Be Accountable for Yourself. Don't blame the problems in your life on other people. Look inwardly for solutions. No one has more control over your life than you have.#p#分頁標(biāo)題#e#
7.對自己負(fù)責(zé)。不要把你生命中的問題歸咎于別人。向內(nèi)審視尋找解決辦法。對于你的生命，沒有人擁有比你自己更強的控制力。

Be Humble. Judge yourself at least as harshly as you judge others.
8.保持謙卑。判斷你自己時，至少要像你判斷別人時那樣嚴(yán)厲。

Assume the Best. Don't distress yourself and others by dwelling on the dark side of everything. Just as there is a positive charge for every negative charge, there is a light side to every dark side. Remember that positive situations are created by positive attitudes. Expect the best, and the best will come forward.
9.設(shè)想最好的情況。不要對所有事情的黑暗面念念不忘，苦惱自己和別人。正如每個負(fù)電荷都有其對應(yīng)的正電荷一樣，每個黑暗面都有其對應(yīng)的光明面。記住積極的形勢是由積極的態(tài)度創(chuàng)造出來的。期待最好的情況，最好的情況會來臨的。

Relax! Do yourself a favor and learn how to effectively unwind. Get exercise and restful sleep. Take vacations. Engage in relaxing activities. Take care of yourself and your loved ones by learning to let go of your passion and intensity for a respite.
10.放松！幫你自己一個忙，學(xué)習(xí)如何有效的放松。進行鍛煉，充分睡眠。休假。沉浸在放松性的活動中。愛護你自己和你愛的人，學(xué)會放下你的熱誠和濃烈的感情一段時間。